I enjoyed seeing the passage of time in this and especially liked your description of Thranduil, 'like the flame that fascinates.'
Report this review, #25, for abuse of site guidelines.(Opens new window)
 Reviewer:JastaElf Date:February 6, 2006 3:36 PM
Oh, what a lovely tale! Not surprising, because it's you who wrote it and I like your stuff--but lovely, so lovely, in a sweet-but-sad kind of way. Interesting to observe the familiar Elves from a Human viewpoint, and though I had a feeling what was coming, it was sad nonetheless... kind of foreshadows what Legolas will go through over his long life, with all the mortals he will know, love and lose.... *sob!*
The characterizations were nice as well--a stern but melting Thranduil is a lovely sight, and if I could draw at all, I would do a pic of Little!Legolas asleep in his Ada's arms during the party.... :-) One thing I particularly liked was that Legolas was honest with his Adar about spending time with the Mortal lady. That was a nice touch.
I have a plot critter for you. *g* It's movie-verse... and while I don't think Legolas would really have bit Aragorn's head off about death and futility like they had him do, it sets this up nicely. Suppose, after they growl at each other, Legolas is outside among the people, upset, wandering, trying to figure out his own state of mind... and he encounters a Man in his prime, perhaps mid-thirties, wearing rough armor over the clothes of a merchant. And in his hand is... the pearl necklace that Legolas gave to his Mortal friend as a remembrance... it could perhaps turn out that his wife is a descendant of the woman and married into Rohan... She gave him the necklace, a prized family heirloom (she would therefore be the descendant through the eldest son, more than likely...), and asked him to carry it into battle "for luck". They talk, the Man learns that Legolas is the one who gave the necklace, and in awe he comes to believe all will somehow be well because it's too odd to be coincidence, that Leggy would be there.... and off he goes, his cheer infectious, and the mood shifts. Legolas then goes back to apologize to Aragorn.... *g* If I had the time I would write it for you as a thank-you gift for a sweet story, but there you are. Life is sometimes like that. :-)
One teensy suggestion: the changes between scenes are a bit abrupt when there is no break of any kind to mark a change. If you intended that, it works. *g* I would have hoped for something--a line of asterisks or some other symbol perhaps--between the changing of scenes, the passing of years, but most especially between the death of the original Lady and the visit to her grave. Just a thought...
In any case, thank you VERY much for a lovely read! Cheers, Jasta
Report this review, #648, for abuse of site guidelines.(Opens new window)